It's been a along time since I wrote something on my blog (usually everyone is saying that):). I find it harder to write things on my blog now then 6 years ago. I guess the more you get older the more your words and opinions are measured by others and you became judged by the unknown people who you hope will stop by to read your blog and you secretly hope they will like what they read or they will admire your capability of doing things. Don't we all do that, trying to please or impress the people in some way? I wonder sometimes if girls-women like to impress more men or other women. It's a big competition among the women; who is more capable or perfect in what they do. I really admire women who have couple of kids and they still have time to blog regularly, to cook, take photos, do art work and crafts, keep the house perfectly clean, read books ...How they do that???Most of them will never admit that they struggle with depression (if they do), rejection, or with some other emotional situation or life disappointment. Pushing the limits of good, burdening them self with the idea to be representable perfect...They feel happy to reach the line of perfection that they put for them self , and they go even further on. I don't say this is wrong or right, I just make observation of the things I face mostly in my 30s.
I find it heard all of this growing up system. It's a new set of rules in your 30st. No one had ever taught me about it. First of all no one have ever told me that 30s are years were you face a lot of disappointments. When you were 20 you were planing big future for your 30s: big family, beautiful house, your favorite job, good car, maybe a mission life or stable position in the church, many friends .... but then in your 30s you are still not married, or you are married but can not have kids,or you have hard time earning money to satisfy your needs,years pass by and you are still not at the mission filed working with poor in Africa, then you blame yourself for beings so obsessive to have kids or husband or more money instead of focusing on God and being joyful in Him as you were when you were younger; you struggle to make the balance of material and spiritual, it is a big test of the faith that unfortunately many are failing to pass, it's like "finding" God all over again relevant for your life and needs.You understand more that your life in faith is more of a marathon then sprint. In this years you either convince your self that faith in God was a fase in your youthful life but now you have "more important" things to do,or you rededicate your life again fully to the Lord and you find God in new higher level.
Women are becoming more emotionally vulnerable in their 30s. More single women in there 30s then ever before. A lot of single mothers and women who will try every way to have kids even if they don't have a husband. A good looking guys in there 30s who are more happy to be single and admired by women then to have one next to them. Or guys who are not so in love with them self but they never have the courage to take the action and "fight" for love. I talked with couple of single guys I know, asking them what they look for in a women. Some of them who didn't have much relationships experience described a not existing perfect creature; some of them can not develop strong feelings for anyone because they are afraid that she mait not be the perfect one, and many of them who had lost the desire to fight for affection.Also people are afraid of divorce before they even start the relationship.The worst fear of "what if...?". Anyway, when it comes to the relationship I don't have much opinion, if I have it, it mait be a bitter one... on the end it's all mystery to me.:)
In your 30s you start wondering about your dreams and how did it happen that you lost them. Dreaming all over again it's very important thing to encourage in your 30s. Sating a new dreams will keep you go on.
The good things about 30s is that you start to know yourself better and by now you know whats your weaknesses and you find your self predictable.You know how will you react or respond to some things.
One of the hardest things in your 30s is to see your parents getting old, really old. The fear of losing them is strongly connected with you feelings of stability, home, security and love.The lost is idea that you try to suppress the most in your 30s.
It is true that 30s are the most productive years, you feel more strong and capable of doing things, you dream about big promotion at work and many good business ideas are born then.
I'm still in my early 30s so I can not cover the whole 30s experience. Maybe you are seeing things differently. I would love to hear what others are thinking about it.
The most important thing for me in this- crucial years of my life is to have my hope and joy, identity and satisfaction in God. It sound so cheesy but is so true and is very important.
